So Mama Rhoda arrived yesterday. She owns the compound where I live. It's like I imagine itinerant housing for migrant workers in the 1920s would look. Two rows of four units. Electricity but no kitchen, water or toilet. Only a living area and bedroom. Her unmarried sons occupy three units and their babies and baby mamas live in three. She rents another to a single Mom with two kids and then there is my unit. Her sons manage the compound, handymen (kinda), burn the trash, feed the cows and chickens and plant the garden.
So when I came in from work with Sukari yesterday, I stopped to greet her and chat for a few minutes. She said she was happy to see me on her once a month visit.
This morning as I was walking out for work with Sukari, she ran out screeching at me in her best KaSwEnglish (an incomprehensible mix of Kalingen, Swahili and British English). I managed to decifer the gist which was basically "Sukari ni mafi na spoiling my compound." Meaning, Sukari is shitting and ruining my grass. She promptly ushered me over to the area in question as we dodged spots of chicken squirts and massive piles of loosey-goosey cowpies to show me the evidence. NO WAY! Believe me. If Sukari had pushed out that poo she would have hemorrhoids the size of gonads! In my best SwEnglish, I stated that the evidence belonged to the hood dogs that prowl the rotting garbage piles at night. She didn't believe there were any other dogs around. I showed her where Sukari prefers to squat, outside my front door area by the fence, and informed her that I scoop the poop and put it in the trash pile. I got that 'sure you do' look from her. I promised that she could come to me at any time and I would gladly remove any droppings that had been deposited elsewhere.
So Sukari and I proceeded on to work with her glaring after me down the road. As I walked off my anger I thought of telling her how she really needed to attend to a few things for me. Like maybe dig me a new choo since mine is full and flooded. Or repair the roof where water runs down the walls in my living room area and is beginning to mildew. Or maybe ask her boys to keep the cows and chickens from crapping in my front yard so I won't have to leap like a high jumper over their evidence! But then I remembered that my boss is late on my rent. So I'll hold my thoughts for a bit in case I would piss her off and she would evict me.
Wish I had a picture of Mama Rhoda to show you. I don't. If I did I would probably use my paint app and draw a wild mustache, crossed eyes and freckles on her the way we used to do in grade school. Maybe even a wicked mole or two with a long hair growing from each of them.
We arrive at a local hoteli at 9:55 for a 10am meeting and hang out till 10:30 with noone in sight. I tell the manager he needs to set up the room for our meeting, which he does. Then I call my boss to ask if the meeting had been moved. No. It was cancelled last night and he forgot to call me. Great. Thanks alot.Now I look like a stupid muzungu having the room all set up for nothing.
In the meantime, some days just suck.
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